More to Love, the new Bachelor-eque show on Fox made to help ”normal” women find love, premiered last night. The fact the show showcases overweight women on their search for love has drawn mixed emotions from viewers. Some believe it is exploitative of the contestants, some believe its segregation, and some applaud it for doing something that has never been done before.
I watched the premiere last night, and I have to say, it wasn’t what I was expecting.
Many are saying the show is exploitative of the contestants, dragging their insecurities out into the open and undermining their feelings to make good TV-dismissing the show and the journey for these people to find love, as just a “Fat Bachelor.”
I don’t think its exploitative of the contestants at all- I think its more of a social test for us viewers. If ratings are low, we all have proof that that we are superficial and not interested in watching anyone but the “size 2′s.” If ratings are high, and we fall in love with the show, we are accepting and open minded (or curious and fascinated, depending on the media outlet.)
The women on the show are all overweight, generally in the 200 pound area, but they are also shockingly confident- not confident for being over weight, but confident, period. I wouldn’t have the balls to go on national television and say things like, “I’m awesome” or to cry about my biggest insecurity or admit that I had never been on a date- not because I wasn’t good enough, but because other people are too superficial to look past my appearance.
At first I was put off by the fact that the only thing the producers seemed to interview the women about was their weight- I didn’t want to sit through a crying pity-party, but the more they talked, I noticed they weren’t actually talking about their weight, they were talking about how their weight has effected their love life, which is precisely why they are on the show.
I think after the first show, weight won’t be a big focus anymore. There will be cat fights and embarrassing drunk episodes to keep us viewers entertained with plenty of crying and jealousy to boot.
I don’t think the point of the show is to teach us anything. If it were, the man who chooses from all the women would look like a stereotypical “Bachelor”- tall, dark, handsome, ripped beyond belief, and would be forced to look beyond the weight of the female contestants to find true love-showing all of us at home that love is really blind. That’s not the case. The man all the women are competing for is Luke, a successful 26 year old real estate investor is also overweight, and looking for the same thing as the women: someone to love him unconditionally. The show seems to be more of a “Hey, we are here, don’t ignore us. We can fall in love and be attractive and interesting just like anyone else.”
I think Luke is a bit of cornball (If someone told me the first time I met him that he liked my eyes because they matched my dress, and tried to swoop in for a kiss, I’d head for the door) but he seems nice enough, and is willing to give these women an experience they have never had before, so I have to hand it to him.
I get asked about “fat acceptance” a lot- I guess because I am both a woman and a personal trainer. People find it surprising when I say I support it- how can I support an unhealthy lifestyle? I don’t. I don’t see people as their lifestyles. I know a person is more than their weight, and I support people. Perhaps more importantly, I respect people that realize they themselves are more than their weight and aren’t ashamed to say it. I wish every woman could be that way.
Of course everyone should take care of their health, but everyone has something about their lifestyle that is detrimental to their health- be it smoking, or drinking, or an addiction to sweets or diet soda or being of a “healthy” weight but sedentary. It is just unfortunate some people can’t hide theirs from the world, and that those who are overweight have to wear it for all to see, and judge, everyday.
Maybe we actually can learn something from this show: that its okay to be confident in who you are, and that you can want to change certain aspects of yourself without being ashamed of who you are.
Interesting article. I just couldn’t bring myself to watch it. It seemed like the network was making fun of the women. Glad to hear the women were confident though!!
-A
I didn’t watch the show b/c I pretty much hate all the dating type reality shows, but I do like the concept. As someone who is overweight myself, I struggle with confidence everyday. I always feel like people are judging me by my extra pounds, whether or not that is true doesn’t even matter b/c it’s how I feel. Maybe I could learn something from these women.