Unless you have yet to sleep in the same bed with a man, you’ve felt it.  You know, that gentle kiss on the back of your neck while you are fast asleep or close to it, his body pressed up against yours and that hand that starts to glide up and down your hips.

Universally, we know what this means.  Your man is ready and wants it.

And nothing can be so crushing to his ego as “I’m tired.” “I have a headache.” “Let’s just do it in the morning.”  Rejected.

So what is a couple to do when their sex drives don’t match? Does this mean they are destined for failure?

Here are some tips to cope when your libido isn’t in sync with his level of lust.

1. Don’t dwell –

The problem may be temporary.  Many factors determine how often we want sex.  An increase in stress can easily mean a decrease in sex.  Don’t make it an issue if it may be resolved in its own time.

2. Quality not quantity –

Rather than fixate on how many times a day, week, or month you and your man should be having sex, focus on making your romp sessions quality ones.  Add a toy, buy some lingerie, bring a friend – whatever you and your partner are comfortable doing that makes your time together more fun and fulfilling.

3. Speak-

Open up a conversation with your partner.  Let them know how you are feeling.  See if there’s a reason for their increase or decrease in drive.  Take the time to listen.  Your partner may be repressing an issue and letting you know there’s a problem by holding out in the bedroom.  Open the lines of communication because holding out is never a way to solve a problem!

If the problem is serious, it doesn’t have to mean failure.  It may be time to looking in to hiring a sex therapist who can help you cope; however, the problem can be averted to begin with by knowing what you want prior to entering a relationship with someone whose sex drive differs from your own.

By not making it an issue if it’s temporary, focusing on bringing quality to your sex life, and having open discussions, you and your partner can get over the sex slump.