And i read over the comments and dont think anyone saidf anything about yelling…

Thanks for writing.

I never made a comment the clothing observation. I’m well aware that almost all reality contestants wear inappropriate outfits, and Sarah’s right, it ain’t cute on anyone, no matter what their body type is. But frankly, people can do what they want to do and wear what they want to wear because it doesn’t affect me in the least.

The thrust of my comment was not to assert that anyone should be pitied. The God’s honest truth is that everything they talk about and engage in is scripted. The contestants are asked leading questions, made to face “assumed” fears (swimsuits on national TV), and put in awkward situations the tease old, perhaps painful memories to the surface.

When I said that Sarah was being a tad insensitive because admittedly she isn’t overweight, what I’m saying is that we shouldn’t be judging the women themselves for being whiny and unable to “get over it,” but instead place criticism on the television station for crafting, manipulating, and editing the same message we hear about fat people all the time: they’re sad, lonely, and eat a lot.

And I agree with Kelly- Luke is just out there to get some, I mean who asks about love and promise rings (that you have to give back) and for kisses and such right away.

I’ll just stick with “Daisy of Love” because you know that’s all about empowerment (haha)

And the comment about inappropriate clothing was towards ALL contestants on these kinds of shows- thin or overweight. Where is your outrage defending the thin ones?

i dont understand why everyone has to be so nice and sensitive all the time. Ive written my fair share on the fat acceptance movement, and the very last thing over weight people want is to be tip toed around and pitied all the time. It is never acceptable to call names or purposefully hurt someonesince they are overweight we cant even comment on their clothes or the fact that they do nothing but cry and whine and complain?

Making them go to prom is insulting. They are adult women- why are we rehashing high school memories of rejection? Isnbt the point of the show to show they are more than their weight? yet it is what the entire show is fixated on?

I do disagree with one of sarah’s comments though- i think Luke is a douche

I normally love, adore, and agree with much of what you write, yet I can’t help but feel that this is coming across as a little (too) insensitive.

Your sentiment that eventually we have to move past the hang-ups we feel about our personal appearance so that we can showcase who we are on the inside is spot on, I couldn’t agree more. And I’m also POSITIVE this is edited to come across as overly body conscious, as you mentioned.

What I can’t get behind is this: “Now granted, I’m not overweight, but I know for a fact that just because one is overweight, this does not mean that all that person talks about is a) what their favorite food is; b) why being overweight is a huge obstacle in their dating life; c) how much it hurt that they didn’t go to their high school prom because they were overweight.”

You’re not overweight. My guess is that you probably never were (more than a few pounds or post-pregnancy, perhaps), although correct me if I’m wrong. It’s hard. And it’s not that (fat) people don’t “get over” the sh*tty things that happen to them, it’s just that being in such an environment probably brings these feelings to the surface.

Being fat is something you have to deal with every day, and a lot of times comments come from OTHER people. People who feel it’s ok to say things about your body or appearance just because they think it.

I have a feeling that a little more understanding and a little less judgment is just what these women are looking for, on screen and off.