Love in the Workplace: Smart Women, Poor Choices

By Sarah Matheny on October 6th, 2009

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The buzz this week has been all about the David Letterman scandal.  While the story has evolved, public discussion has turned from the ugliness of attempted extortion to the downright stupidity of having sex with your boss.

Here’s my take on it:  Don’t do it.  Period. There are enough men out there to date that don’t sign your paychecks and if you really think that your employer is “the one,” do both of you a favor and quit your job before you start your relationship.

One of the unknown number of women Letterman admits to having sex with is his former assistant, Stephanie Birkitt.  I remember watching her on several Letterman episodes and found her so appealing:  she had a dry humor and a deadpan delivery that played off perfectly with Letterman and deli owner Rupert Jee.  Now, of course, I have no idea how this relationship came to fruition or what motivated Stephanie Birkitt to sleep with her boss.  Maybe she thought it would help her get ahead.  Maybe she felt pressured by Letterman.  Quite, possibly she was just attracted to an intelligent and funny man in a position of celebrity or power.

No matter how this plays out, though, the fact of the matter is, she had a choice.  While it takes two to tango, there’s an ultimate responsibility we have as women in the workplace.  I think having sex with your boss not only undermines your own hard work to be in your position, but undermines the work that generations of women have done to be seen as something other than sexual objects in the workplace.

While David Letterman will likely only have a boost in the ratings as a result of the scandal, there will be nothing but criticism, such as mine, for the women who essentially traded their careers for the trysts. Who is going to hire Birkitt, overlooking the scandal and her poor choices and overlooking those talents which it was apparent to me that she had? Instead of being “that funny girl that was ON Letterman,” she’ll be “that funny girl that was UNDER Letterman.” That’s not exactly the ideal resume builder.

Shame on David Letterman for crossing the line, but shame on the women who work for him and slept with him for not drawing it.