Get a Load of Daphne Guinness: The Tiny Woman in the Huge Shoes

By Kendra Gilbert on November 23rd, 2009

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First of all, let’s all let out the big collective “ouch” we immediately feel when we see these pictures of Daphne Guinness and her towering heels. This is one lady who takes the old adage “fashion over function” literally. Or perhaps she lives her life by the creed, “no pain, no gain.” Whatever it is, there must be some motivation behind her strapping her feet into such sadistic shoes.

I think she is suffering from an extreme love of couture and tiny-girl syndrome (bloggers speculate that she’s between 5′2″ and 5′4″, and she doesn’t look like she weighs more than 100 lbs). Those two conditions combined add up to one teeny-tiny girl walking around in some very high heels. Still, I love her sense of adventure and feet-may-care approach to footwear. And the lady knows how to put together an outfit, from head to toe. So I can’t really knock her style. All I can do is send my condolences to her feet.

Two pairs of shoes really need to be addressed, though. First, the ballet slippers from hell! I think I once saw these shoes on an episode of “America’s Next Top Model” a couple months ago. And the girl wearing them could barley stand, let alone walk. So I don’t know how Daphne managed a whole night in them. I’m usually a big fan of all things ballet-esque, but these are grotesque. And slightly phallic. And about eight inches high! Her legs look like toothpicks sticking out of two cocktail wieners. Second, the wicked heel-less Nina Ricci shoes. This picture explains it all. Look at the concentration on her face. Every step must have been a battle not to fall down.

Keep on walking girl. But, maybe give your aching soles a break once in a while.