When Jennifer Lopez was J.Lo and dating P. Diddy she was all about the bandannas, belly tops and braids. Then she met and bamboozled Ben Affleck into creating a Bentley-driving power couple signified by label lust and one very gaudy engagement ring that was sold after “Bennifer” went back to being Ben and Jennifer. Now that she’s married to Marc Anthony and owns the Miami Dolphins, she’s taken a liking to dressing not like her overly-suave husband, but like a delegate to all the regional Florida cliches: a little Boca nursing home muumuu here, a little Daytona Beach 500 pit crew jumpsuit there. And then there are the times she dresses like the fourth Kardashian sister.
Back in the day, Jennifer Lopez knew how to grab headlines in dresses that barely covered all the necessary parts (the green Versace from the P. Diddy days, for example), but that flashy tastelessness she once had is slipping. Slipping into a very weird place where she wears a nearly-shear bedazzled onesie on New Year’s Eve as a sexy statement. The headlines she’s grabbing these days show her in huge maxi dresses and full-body jumpers (or talking crazy about being denied an Oscar). Something very weird is happening in the Sunshine State.
I’ve seen her pull it together for an event or two lately, and actually look better then she ever has, but the Miami pull is too strong and it won’t be much longer before we lose the bootylicious “Jenny From the Block” to early bird dinners and shuffle board with the other retirees in Florida. Looks like the entertainment at the retirement home is going to get a little better! I’m just not sure if “Love Don’t Cost a Thing” will resonate with that audience.
