You say tomato, I say tomato. It’s the little nuances each person brings to the table that makes your relationship great, right?
As people grow and change, so do their points of view, wants and desires. I remember speaking to a woman I used to work with who was still happily married to her husband of 35 years. “I think part of it is chance, Lisa,” she said. ”I mean how do you really know that what you want won’t change? How do you know that you’ll grow together instead of apart?”
Her words about marriage have stuck with me. I do believe part of it is chance, and in an ideal world, if you keep each other’s best interest at heart, you will grow together. However, sometimes differences creep up and they can be difficult to handle. But if you’re in it for the long haul, these tips can help you overcome differences and remember why you love the one you’re with.
1. Carry your partner’s heart. The words of the famous (and my favorite) poet e.e. cummings come in handy when you are trying to get over differences between you and your partner: “i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)i am never without it.” These poetic lines are a reminder that when you make a life commitment to your partner, you do carry their heart with you. Their heart is the most prized possession you carry. Remembering this can help you set aside differences and work together toward making your lives together harmonious.
2. Everyone needs room to grow. No one wants a static life partner. It is growth and change that make each of us a dynamic human being. When your partner wants to make a career move or other major life decision that you don’t agree with, remember that everyone needs room to explore and grow. Give your partner space and be supportive. If they follow tip number one, your partner won’t do anything to hurt you. Allow them time and space to change so they will be likely to do the same for you.
Although no relationship comes with a guarantee, allowing each other space and being protective of your partner’s best interest and heart will help ensure you grow together instead of apart.
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