Ever been caught in an uncomfortable, annoying, or just plain boring conversation? We can’t tell you how to avoid them, but we can tell you how to make sure you’re never the one causing them:
Don’t hijack other people’s conversations and make it all about you. It’s always nice to contribute but avoid upstaging with statements like “you think that’s funny, I have something even funnier…” or the obvious “I can do you one better…”
Inappropriate eye contact This can go both ways: too much or too little. Not looking at someone enough while you’re talking to them can cause you to come off as aloof and uninterested (i.e. texting or rifling through your purse while talking) or shy (looking at your hands or at the floor), while looking at them too much or too intensely can make them uncomfortable.
Too much self-promotion It doesn’t take much to hit ‘too much.’ Pumping yourself up the whole time only has the opposite effect of making you come off as insecure and like you’re trying too hard.
Talking more or less than your share Conversations are, by definition, a two-way street at minimum. Don’t throw off the balance by either talking too much and drowning the other person out, or by talking too little and letting the conversation hang on ‘dead end answers’ like just yes or no.
Ghost listening We’ve all done it at some point: you’ve asked someone to repeat themselves several times and finally just fake it and pretend you understood even though you have no idea what they said. This is obviously a dangerous strategy and can leave the other person feeling even worse than if you’d just fessed up and asked them to repeat themselves one more time.
(Photo courtesy of telefon897 on stock.xchng)
Great tips Rigel, thanks for sharing. I talk about this on my blog as well. You would probably like this article too: http://www.socialbling.org/?p=420