Is honesty always the best policy? And is neglecting to mention something really the same as lying? Although some white lies are harmless, others can devastate a relationship. Here’s how to tell the difference, based on 5 of the most common secrets women keep from men.
Secret #1: You splurged on an expensive guilty pleasure like a new pair of shoes or a designer handbag.
When it’s okay to keep quiet: If it’s a one-time indulgence and you used your own money.
When you should fess up: If you used joint funds that were meant for something else, if you’re racking up credit cards or other debt, or if you’d be upset to find out he spent a similar amount on something for himself and didn’t tell you.
Secret #2: You’ve been contacting an ex.
When it’s okay to keep quiet: If you’re really just interested in casual friendship and the contact is limited to quick emails or Facebook comments.
When you should fess up: If things feel flirty, if you’ve been talking to him on the phone, or if you’ve scheduled a meet-up or have already gotten together in person. Just think how you would feel if things were reversed and it was your man and one of his exes.
Secret #3: You snooped.
When it’s okay to keep quiet: If it was a minor, spur-of-the-moment slip like reading an email he left open on his computer screen or scrolling through his recent calls list when you accidentally took his phone to work instead of yours.
When you should fess up: If you don’t trust him, or if you have a pathological snooping problem (he’ll be more understanding if he ever catches you in the act).
Secret #4: You really can’t stand his best friend, or his favorite aunt.
When it’s okay to keep quiet: If you don’t like them because they aggravate you or are not “your kind of people” then there’s really no helping it and you’re gonna have to suck it up and tolerate them. After all, it’s rare for a person to like everybody in their significant other’s life.
When you should fess up: If you feel genuinely uncomfortable or unsafe then you should speak to your partner about it, privately.
Secret #5: You slipped on a dirty habit, like smoking.
When it’s okay to keep quiet: If you only slip up every once in awhile, like sneaking a smoke once every few months with friends, and there’s no developing pattern.
When you should fess up: If it’s getting worse, if there’s a pattern forming, or if you’ve fallen off the wagon completely.
(Photo courtesy of YPsilon13 on stock.xchng)
