Entertainment
David Woods
David
Woods
January 13, 2012

Paula Deen Diabetes Shocker! She’s Capitalizing On Her Disease Already

Here’s the shocker of the century: celebrity chef Paul Deen, famous for using enough butter in her recipes to give heart attacks to an entire starving nation, has type 2 diabetes (the one that you’re likely to get when you’re fat).

Can you believe that? Take a minute to compose yourselves if you need to.

According to reports, she’s been trying to keep the news a secret. After all, she’s come under fire for shilling ridiculously unhealthy recipes. In a nation that’s getting fatter and fatter, she has become a poster girl for everything that’s wrong with America’s relationship with food. If people ever found out that the recipes she pushes are bad for them, she would be ruined, right?

Yeah, right. This is America we’re talking about.

Now that the news it out, it appears Deen is ready to embrace it–and profit off it it. She has reportedly signed a deal worth millions of dollars to endorse a particular brand of diabetes medication. I’m guessing this particular brand offers pills that you can deep fry and serve with a side of ranch dressing.

She’s living the dream, folks. Eating whatever the heck she wants and getting rich off of it. What a great lesson to send to all of us.

If you need me, I’ll be in the back munching on some carrot sticks.